*DISCLAIMER: I am not a doctor, therapist, or health professional of any kind. I’m sharing things that I have been taught that have helped me (or not). This is my experience.


Thursday, December 4, 2014


I need someone to talk to and I'm turning to this blog out of desperation.  No one is answering their phones and I'm feeling panicky.  I applied and was accepted to an awesome four year school (Coe College).  I was offered an impressive (to me) financial aid package including a large scholarship.  All I can think about is if I'll be able to get through school, if I can actually do this.  School doesn't even start until January 12th.  That's a long time to be second guessing myself.  I have a meeting on Monday with the registrar's assistant and one of the science professors to determine if I can meet my pre-pharmacy requirements and still graduate with a bachelor's degree in either biology, chemistry, or general science.  I'd like to be able to get through with a bio or chem degree just because it looks better for pharmacy school.  My financial aid package is good for two and half years, so five semesters.  If I can get things wrapped up within that time frame it would be ideal.

The other thing I have to worry about is the PCAT, the standardized test that basically decides your future in pharmacy.  I need to find out what subjects the test covers so that I can figure out when I will be ready to take it.  If I won't be ready to take the PCAT until after I graduate then I will have to take a year off between Coe and pharmacy school.  Normally students take their PCAT the summer after their junior year but because I haven't taken any of the classes for my major yet it's an open-ended question as to when I should take it.

Now for a reality check.  I have to admit that I'm still fighting the feeling that I'm alone.  My brother is always here so physically someone is always with me, but I still can't shake this feeling.  I have no friends here but I hope to make some at school.  School, however, is another month away.  Maybe I feel empty, like I have no purpose, as I spend day after day wasting my time.  I don't know what I feel but I don't like it.  It's definitely resulting in anxiety that I'm having a difficult time handling.  Ugh.

While I'm complaining I'd like to add in that my restless legs are driving me crazy.  I've taken Requip and they just switched me to something else a few weeks ago.  So far I am not impressed.

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